The Devil That Reborns The Very Nex Second

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Refresh on childhood memories.
Remember the name of toilet bowl still,
by then I'm sure of the feelings again.
It's never the other him,
It was just the face of his.

Moving on,
but never will let it go.
In denial state,
but the feelings never true.

A piece of my mind will never be reach out...

busy with spring cleaning...sianz~

*Chris

Ponkies x
7:42:00 PM

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Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Let time fles on its own,
don't do it on purpose.

It's never going to happen,
for it's not mend to,
and there's no feeling.

As I'm always in where I am,
never move or bugle,
only to remain,
waiting in silence.

I don't plan to get,
but play to agitate,
driving you off,
sending you to nowhere,
where the distance is far enough.

Thank god you were never the one...
Get away from me...of cos you will
Leave me alone... sure you will
And shall never return...certainly!
Things must lay unsaid and undone..

*Chris from what I see and think...

Ponkies x
8:28:00 PM

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I just received the email. Improving my pudding. I think it is easy to say than practically done. Hopefully replace him with those bought from the stores over mine is better. Seriously I can't cook. By the way, he's the first one whom I really cooked for besides my parents. Come to it, no one would dare to try or eat so this shows that lao da is noble. Just hope to see him soon.

I'm having fun playing with shuai-ge seriously. I would not worries that he would say he likes me a all. Importantly, I had to make a clear note for the miss pig, which her brain was small enough to understand. He is only an assistant supervisor to me. No more, but I would also call him lao peh which is also means of lao pa(father). I TREAT HIM AS A FATHER, then you are the mother. Both of you so compatible....wahaha..both of you should be the one rather than me.

PIG + GORILLA = ???

never act smart to assume
as love can't be force
to neither of us

*Chris

Ponkies x
8:11:00 PM

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Sunday, January 27, 2008

Yes! She's back on the 25th, night. Her hell over there was finally over. 4 months of attachment in China, Bejing was over. She should have made some friends over there, just like those Chinese who came over here for practical exam as well. She might have quite some experiences now in HTM, indeed that makes her think it is tougher. Sigh! She going to graduate soon, in 1 or 2 months time. It was just so fast that she going to plan her path, her future occupation. I think most likely she will be taking tour guide? Personally, I'm not sure but she don't really like F&B line and hotel management that much. So what will she be choosing?

Yan, time to decide. In another 1 1/2 yr we going taiwan le! Let's save to our target ^^..hehe

*miss u...cya latas...

*Chris

Ponkies x
3:58:00 PM

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Saturday, January 26, 2008

好恨自己....
因为我好想他...
我只能眼巴巴的看着他...
当他一辈子的无形守护天使吧..
希望他能一切顺利...
包括爱情..
你快乐..
我就放心了...
到时, 不希望你那美丽的眼睛...
充满生气的眼神消失啊!

我真的想见你一面...
相信你会记得我...
不会像他说的:
不记得也不认的人了...
因为你那时的眼神已告诉我,
你还记得我...
只是我们没说出口罢了..

再会了~

*Chris

Ponkies x
7:40:00 PM

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王露老大终于回信啦!
在这瞬间, 我之前的烦恼与悲伤已抛掷九霄云外了.
好幸福哦!
没了低潮和疲劳, 只觉得快乐!
呵呵!
果然想这一个人会难过, 一旦有了他的消息一切就不一样啦!
而且他即将回到新加坡工作了!
大家有能相聚了.
希望到时候, 程程, 宝哥哥, 刘杨, 贞月也会来!
到时我就是全球最幸福的人了!
因为不用在去想念了嘛~
老天爷, 对不起, 我知道我很贪心喔^^~

希望许着生日愿望还来得及..:P

即时最幸福的人上.
*Chris

Ponkies x
4:56:00 PM

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I don't think I'm able to move on anymore. I may either remain in square one or it just frozen forever. I just hope that you won't over think about who I like. Truly admit, I have no one in mind yet. I just miss my lu wang lao da and the celloist...

Misses someone is bad as hell,
It always with pieces of memories.
Nothing more that can replace,
Now only hoping for their reappearance again.
Bringing by fate..

*Chris

Ponkies x
4:14:00 PM

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Thursday, January 24, 2008

Never been this tired before. For mentally, emotionally and physically. I'm going to give myself soon, I think. The moment I opened my eyes, I started to do housework till rushing for job. Sleeping on bus shows it all. I'm tired. Back at home resting, cracking my brain to fix internet connections, going online trying to bring friends back. It's all really so tough and tedious. Brain working coordinating in planning of schedule. Aw shacks! Now everything getting mess up! Worst I'm wondering why poeple miss me so much. They wanted to meet me so much. At work, plump one asking me when i'll be still working. Tiny ones ask me what time I'm working. God bro said I'm too busy to meet him up that often. Indo friend wants me meet with her again by next week before she went back for CNY. And my click says as if seeing me disappearing as well. Have I been missing alot that much that nobody can find me yet? Ha! Looks like I am what my secondary mates said: I'm like a ghost. Pop in and zoom out till no one notice sometimes I'm right beside. It even gave them a shock. I think I'm going to space myself evenly, to show my presence. Importantly, to meet what others may want.

I'm tired already.
Pls don't give me the torture anymore.
I have enough of you!
Feel free to slap me in the face
Than making me dying out.
Tired...
Or get away from me...

Giving advice,
Yes I can.
It helps people,
But never be me.
It kills my cell,
Sore my eyes and heart...

For once,
I'm praying for someone,
To save my dreadful soul,
Really tired...

I can feel that I misses a lot of people lately. Especially them. Mich and people who I had co-work before. I had lost contact with people from Sumo-house to Jumbo. I remember the place where warmth were all around. I miss my Lu Wang lao da, Feng Bao gor gor, Cheng Cheng the pouty face, Zhang yue the sunshine girl, liu yang the bravo, Nancy our mummy, Winnis my best captain, Wang Ning the nutcase, Yuan yuan the good cook, Ron the ok manager, Tiffany the 'see-la', Lifang the da jie, Lizhen the blur girl, Ye ling the bootlicker, Wanling the stern supervisior, Boss 1 the so-like sumo wrestler, Boss 2 the foul mouth, and sumo kitchen chef...
So much to miss...the days especially. Even though it is just a red dot, still it's hard to see any of them here. Worst when some return to their homeland. I'm feeling lost. No matter how bad is the memories before, it seems good to me now; child care, nursary, kindergarten, PAP, primary or secondary may live scars in me. Maybe I missing time now...

*Chris

Ponkies x
7:12:00 PM

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I want to watch movie! So many new movies coming up around Chinese New Year! Oh no! There's going to be a big hole in my bank soon. So 1,000 a month isn't big at all.

1. CJ 7 (长江七号)
2. 27 dresses
3. Sweeney Todd
4. The mist
5. Linger (蝴蝶飞)
6. Rambo 4
7. Le Grand Chef
8. I Am Legend
9. National Treasure: The Book of Secrets
10. Jumper
11. KungFu Dunk

see...so many movie and i going to be broke. But sad nobody accompany to watch I Am Legend, moreover it going to be over soon. Haiz spoiling my mood~

movies~wanted to watch I Am Legend today morning, alone. But due to someone, I had to go down tonkichi AND WORK! Now I'm just so tired after fixing my internet connectio. Shacks! Dead tired man!

Tick-tock-tick
when's the time slowing,
Oh!
It flies so fast
And I'm wearing out.
Soon my time will stop.

*Chris

Ponkies x
3:59:00 AM

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Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Finally, sun not working and I can go out for once! Thought that I would be late for meeting, then I received a SMS that ah bu will be late for 1/2 an hour. I reached bugis at 7 sharped even though I was released late. She even late for more than 1/2 an hour. Of course on the waiting time, I never waste. I busying looking at the food around at the basement, which was rennovated not long before to change the place into a food heaven. Large varieties provided, only partially for entertainment. I that moment, I have been tempted to more food after moments before seeing it, I was yearning for hotdog buns.

Now what food I'm yearning for:
1. hotdog bun
2. rice ball
3. yogurt
4. hokkaido's fair
5. papa beard's sweet recipe's mochi!

My friend said that after days of being sick, I would feel hungry and tempted easily. Nah, I don;t think so. I'm overly tempted there in the food junction. Yesterday unable to overcome my temptation, I just ate jumbo hotdog bun, hmm still feel that something is missing. Again today, I bought another in school canteen. I had found the missing substances I'm looking for. ^^ But I'm most tempting for the hokkaido fair in ajisen outlet! Haiz...i want to try the dessert so much =P Due to the price is expensive, we go eat sakae sushi in the end. Next time I MUST go! Sad, fio never turned up because of her parents. If not we can talk more, by right our butt was burning after sitting there for 3 hours.

We should cherish what we have before it's gone.
Forever.
We may hate and dread them before
When time pass,
our hearts know
We miss you.
Heart aches and memories flood.

Maybe with her presence, we may hate her for what she doing and words. On the day she's gone, we may smile happily and regard nothing happen. Things just go so fine to us that we don't sense a change. However, when long you will start imaging things and hear her calling your name. By then, you know you miss her more than usual. You need her but she can never be found except in your memories. You will find out on that day, you were trying hard to cover up or that moment you was over run by your hatred. You can see her, talk to her only in your dreams. It's a hateful feeling but we must leave on to bring her proud.

*Chris

Don't know what to react and show her even though I know it well. I just too stubborn to barge; I'm beyond cure I think... Still I'm trying...

Ponkies x
4:05:00 AM

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Today, late for 1st meeting again. Actually, don't intend to come but I promised my friend that I'll come. In the end when I came in, there's only 2 tables in class. HA! Close to the end of school terms, people will be running off. More IT SCM, who would want to attend; with a nerdy faci that nags..no one would have the heart. Good thing is when we attend, he promise to start the 3rd meeting early and even let us off faster. For once I feel that his good^^. Yasmin, you darling is good for once you know? Maybe he need a kiss as a reward so that he can be macho and protect you again. You should have come sayang. What a waste, when you never come and we cant see a good show by kissing on the spot.

*Hope that today's lesson can end short and sweet, don't want to see too much of him. I give this opportunity to Yas...^^*

Long day and hours,
when can it be over.
Riding wheels,
flying kites?
Just don't do.
Sleep over,
And another day risen.

*Chris

Ponkies x
2:56:00 AM

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Tuesday, January 22, 2008

3 days never go online due to the down internet connections. Tomorrow the supply going to be back! Ya...i don't feel like missing a thing without internet. Haha, looks like I can survive without technology huh? But don't call be caveman, I know how to use technology appliances. Just that it is so unconvinent. When out of the day without internet I can spend my time usefully. Of course not doing housework but doing personal stuff. More it was till late in the night and I'm not going crazy to do it at night. Do something light and easy; to have a break after work.

Here you go (a bit proud of my work^^):

Without words! Ha ha and you can see who's missing right? Haiz..jux that day dun wana take :(= miss sim fen ru(pig) but she own me neoprints haha(Within this year* a must!)

(With words along wif the pic =P)

Showing my gratitude to my presents and people who given. Lovely presents yea? Haha but some I dun wana open yet. Ha ha...some more presents rolling in =P will also place it here soon ^^ Thx ppl~

*Chris

Ponkies x
9:19:00 AM

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Friday, January 18, 2008

Just smsed yin. We intend to shorten our 1st story and start on an ancient one again. Haha...yea we both like ancient story, and hopefully we can do consistence update man. Ha ha and by now she busy for her tournament and school work, looks like the on going of it will be on wait. Now I am trying to find time for the old one instead ^^...

miss talking to eve le...will email her soon. Now we totally lost contact. Seriously, both of us are too busy. Haiz and my lao da ge oso ^^

Wee so happy! Yan coming back next month le! Can go to her house again. Disturb her and coop her food :p...want to see the change in her ^^...

JIAYOU WOR!! Mich...u can de la....one more month u will be back in homeland le..

*Chris

Ponkies x
4:45:00 PM

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after looking at yin's blog...
waaaaah!
I have an urge of going back to winglin.
Have the tinge of completing my stories on Ray-Mich, Ron-Lei, Nara-JaeWon!
Must complete!
But up till now, I'm too lazy.
Moreover I'm also busy to work.
Well I think of a cheer for myself now...hahaha

Not to be lazy,
Not to abandon.
Go for the last lap.
And all I shall go.
Time!
Go at the length.

Yea I really miss my readers as well. I still have feelings for my stories and I have the idea. Only problem is place time back into pieces. *Going to find my co-writiers back again*...think eve not free by now :p..she's busy wif her science field stuff. haha

Jiayou!

*Chris

Ponkies x
8:06:00 AM

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Thursday, January 17, 2008

Haha...I'm still half dead after sick. Haven't seen any doctor yet. I bet you can't see I'm sick for I'm able to play around and laugh alot. But one big obvious difference is I'm not as talkative as before. That have to leave till you know me ^^

I'm so happy! I received another 3 belated smses! 2 of my sadness is also part of sickness curing. Haha :0
1. my best bud - Mich
2. my god mei - Grace
3. my good friend - Yan

Weee...the 2 most important friend have sms me >_< *sniff* I'm just so touch. Phew! Lucky I'm good enough to back up an explanation for them. Then the god answer me which resulted them to come wishing me.

I turned up very late. Man, who cares when someone is sick. I should say it in another way. You won't know what a sick person will do. Especially those mentally sick. Luckily, you haven't meet me in that condition yet. If not you will regret for what you have done yesterday. I came all the way down in fulfilling your mission, yet you trying to shoo me home. You know what? I feel like spatting some saliva in you face but I know it still meaningless for me to be doing this. You are just someone who is cold-blooded, lose your humanity. If one day, the same thing that happens on me befall your child meeting someone same cruel as you. What will you do as a mother? Why mother? For you only have feelings for your children but not to other people's children. Sympathetic human you can be, just for your fame and solidize your position. In fact you are someone that won't gain much of my sympathise. Now, I just pray that one day you will regret from what you have done and learnt the meaning of it after years, which there is a no more turn back for you anymore...

She likes to show her attitude and listen to her godma talking cock...when can she see things in her eyes? Gosh!...i don't like to be maglin.

Still not yet recover... and tonight have to have dinner with godma and godbro. Hopefully, not too much greasy food for now I'm halfway through. By then, on sat I'll be able to recover. Now I just feel a little sick, that's why I feel so exhausted. Lunar New Year is also approaching as well, I need time to settle down and do some house work before continue working. That's the reason why mom is angry about me part of it is doing the housework. Haiz!

They may have the same thing on earth,
yet it sometimes doesn't shows,
they fear for the return,
yet nothing can be replace,
Shall they look and see,
amend what they can,
which can prevent further lost,
around them and in their space....

*Chris (too tired)

Ponkies x
2:52:00 PM

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Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Yes...14 Jan is yesterday. I'm now a full 20 year old "kiddo"...hahaha Sorry for me to arrive that late...hee but on that occasional day I'm in power....wahaha

We at the HK cafe(everytime go there). I laughed alot yesterday. My qing ai also has lost her gracious that she also can't stop laughing. In the end I think the most graceful among the 7 people is of course her sister, Seow Hui Ting. Sorry dar I just crown you with that adjective anymore. And I think wherever I go, people would laugh and always be happy. Some even said I'm born to be a comedian or an entertainer. Cool is it? I have the talent, and I can spread my joy around. Importantly, we were all talking crap and grossful things most of the time. The great entertain that will may the scence cover with stone when both Mei Qi and I quaralled. Ha ha I think most of the time both of us would "quarel" and get the whole tables attention. We can't leave a topic without quarelling, dead enemies? Hee you may think so but this is how we communicate. Wahaha but Dar dar and I just sitting opposite having a sweet moments. Haha...actually I feel that when we gather together, only 6 are the noisier amount all. Then Amanda and the old man is left out. Haiz as if some "califare" sitting there just for display. Luckily they never felt too left out. 'Cos we like in market shouting here and there, all over the place, laughed so loudly. Also it shows we were in pairs in communication taking turns to entertain everyone all the whole cafe. I think when I'm around especially in a large group. ^^

Ponkies x
2:35:00 PM

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Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Finally, 14 Jan arrive....and I'm finally at 20. How I wish I'm not twenty yet! 'Cause when I'm 20 people will start to nag calling me to behave! Eee...i can't take it anymore! Hee...luckily my look can lie. Hei, not only act and speak ok? They say my appearance looks like someone at age range between 15 to 17! Look! I'm young not by heart, as well as soul and appearance. Ha ha...so Sim Fen Ru don't be jealous of my youth. Wahaha...cos you look more like auntie compare both of us...:p *I'm YOUNG!* ><....
God brothers = 2
SMS receive = 10
Direct in face = 10
MSN greets = 1
Celebration = 7
total blessing = 30
wahaha...felt so bless by people :p...
BUT
1. sad mich nv send me...msg well I help her find an excuse le: she's broke and msg is expensive for overseas ^^
2. sad is my once best friend also nv remember....well she nv remember since last year. Maybe studies and bf is her only thing in mind...
3. sad my god mei grace oso forget le ma...i can dun mind about the present hee some simple wish can le....but i know la..u always belated...haha

Yes...I'm petty :p...and turning 20 today. So fast huh? But I dun care as long as I'm find and happy..

Wishes: 1. Reach for my target
2. Everyone wishes come true
3. Earn more money
4. My idol all must JIA YOU!!
5. Don't waste too much money (SAVE!)

A year isn't long,
Slow as it can be,
Slip out of fast,
without notice,
treasure your time,
to make it more useful...

*Chris

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9:05:00 AM

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Monday, January 14, 2008

BOO!!!...what a bad day..haiz~ my stomach can't take it anymore!
I puked after the stirred throughout the whole night. Gosh! This is the 1st time in my life and can even suffered that much for a peaceful sleep! When I woke up, my head giving off hots causing me losing my appetite and dizziness.

Main cause: Too much food ESPECIALLY greasy food like the caborano linguini (worst food I ever ate)

Right after stuffing those rubbish down for the night, cheezy+creamy+greasy+milky=yucky! I shouldn't eat that man! It brought only burden to my stomach; totally in torture for the night. Luckily, mom knows how to make me vomit those rubbish rather have it jams in there forever. Finally, sour emptied the stomach. Not only make me feeble also making losing appetite for the whole day. See what those great food brought effects on me! By night time, my good god brother accompanied for supper with just a simple cup of milk. Well and I'm so grateful to have 2 great god brothers to celebrate 1st for me...haha though they are not the 1st hee... then he scolded me nuts!!..saying my brain was damaged due to lack of food for the brain or just won a battle with the sickness causing me mental break down..haha

Well true saying:

MY DEAR = WANG SHUAI! aka SHUAI GE!!

I even told ah di that I'm brave enough to call him feed me orange while he was trying to eat. Sadly, he almost knocked out by direct saying and what a waste the orange dropped to the floor. Just wasted a chance for a go..oooh Keong san also shaking his head and burst out laughing. Ha ha....I'm just too brave! wahaha....

Whatever causes thru mouth,
watch what you eat,
know what your stomach takes,
dun force yourself,
if not,
suffering at the door step....

*Chris

Ponkies x
3:30:00 PM

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Saturday, January 12, 2008

Haha....it's only 3 more days to go for me turn 20. Hmm...but alot of people don't think I'm like a 20 years old. Woah! Then I'm youthful! Won't be like others so upset about getting old when their birthday arrive. I should give myself 3 cheers for being young in many people's eyes. Don't be jealous about me look younger. As I'm born to be looking this way; to be optimistic in whatever I went through; remained happy as always; active in whatever I striving for. With reachable target, I won't be stress and down for always. Even though some may be too high for reach, I will still take it step by step, slow as a snail which you may want to say. As long as I reach there, goal is still in my hands. So no worries to all, but people around me always seems to worry alot. Haiz~ well maybe they look further to plan for future, preparing for the worst. I rather be naive and realistic. Ha ha...tackle whatever coming in my way and what's coming up next. This is much more logic rather than over planned and lose your steps before you reach, by then you will be troubling yourself. Yea, yea....I understand~ Leave by myself and in my world...*selfish? who knows!*

Age never counts a things.
Always is the thoughts that plays.
Conscience and firmness that may you grow.
So why bother about beauty and age?
Leave to your pride where the sun shines....

*Chris

Ponkies x
7:38:00 AM

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haiz~ my brain always boils on friday. Friday should be a day where everyone can enjoy and wait patiently for he time to flies. Who knows it can be so tedious, stressful on this half-day school. Gosh! It makes me miss my secondary school days alot! What a good friday which always like to kill millions of my brain cells. After this whole lesson, I'm just so exhausted. It's just like I'm return from the war. War with mathematics, calculation and plotting. Wellz, maybe this is the disadvantage of PBL. Think, find, self-help and WASTE TIME + ENERGY! They expect to give you little help and throw everything to you to make your brain works like engine. Once presentations starts, we just blabbed all we can about our finds and tales. Then again they bombarded us with their questions. Woah what kind of good guidance can that be? I should appreciate them aren't I. Good thing for it at least makes me independent somehow and learn to communicate. Hmm, this is my style of learning without textbook..haha

Now Sim Fen Ru...i have updated out of boredom right during the lesson...haha

What is school.
No one cares.
No one likes.
All I know is a place where I can be occupied!

*Chris

Ponkies x
7:19:00 AM

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